I would like very much to know why more women are not more motivated to have unmedicated births. Could someone please enlighten me?
Giving birth hurts. I get it. I know.
And I realize that sometimes an epidural is really very helpful in achieving a vaginal birth. And sometimes it can help a woman dilate who has stalled.
I get it. I know.
But I want women everywhere to know: YOU HAVE NOTHING TO BE AFRAID OF! YOU WERE MADE TO DO THIS!
If a scrawny, narrow-hipped wimp like me could do it (three times) YOU CAN TOO! (and no, I did not have short, easy labours - at least not the first and third times).
And fathers, for pete's sake, your partner does not need to be rescued! She needs to be supported and told she can do it. She needs you to stand up for her and TRUST in her power and in her ability to handle what she is going through. And if you are afraid of the process of giving birth, maybe you should skip out on the birth and get some confident, supportive females in there instead. Or hire a doula who can support you, so that you can support your partner.
Forgive me. I have been living with student midwives for the last half year and hearing their tales makes me want to yell and scream A LOT!
Here (in case you want it) is my advice for achieving an unmedicated birth:
1. deal with fear; overcome it
2. plan to give birth at home
Soon (when the day has not slipped away quite so far) I will write about why on earth you would want to have an unmedicated birth in this day and age of technological advancement where pain and suffering are no longer necessary.
In the mean time, I'm going to scream a little: AAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGHHHH!
9 comments:
Actually, I'm really curious about the "why". I had a c-section and was thrilled I didn't have to go through labour and vaginal birth. My greatest fear before I found out she was breech was that I would ask for an epidural, and the anesthetist would be busy somewhere else so I'd just have to suffer.
On my pregnancy boards, a lot of people felt really passionately about vaginal birth or going natural, but they never explained why. Like you said, after thousands of years where childbirth was the top killer of women (and still is in many parts of the world), why would anyone deliberately shun the medical assistance available?
Having major abdominal surgery isnt my idea of fun. I had 2 c-sections, one incredibly violent and the other i would consider a success. But i would have rather had a natural birth, since that is what my body is designed to do.
And while there are still women dying from natural births (in areas of the world where they have little to no medical attention, and some of these women have been subjected to body mutilation), there are women in developed countries who elect to have sections who are dying as well. Or, as in this article contract horrible bacterias and have their lives altered.
http://www.boston.com/bostonglobe/magazine/articles/2008/02/10/saving_monica/
This blog has written up a great description of what happens to a woman's body during a section:
http://meconiumhappens.blogspot.com/2008/03/yeah-thats-what-its-like.html
I think what it comes down to is expectations. And you see what you expect to see. If you expect that a section is better, then you ignore the benefits of natural... and i would say that it is easy for the natural camp to miss on the medical side, but Rach watched me and saw why it didnt work... but i think what the question is might be why are medical professionals unquestioned? And why have so few dr's seen a true natural birth? If birthing is as natural as getting pregnant (seeing as they go together) then it stands to reason that many women dont need as much assistance as they are given during delivery.
wow... that was really long winded....
Our society thinks pain is bad. We escape it all costs. I'm not saying pain is something I look for. But I hope that I can come out of it stronger.
Which makes me think of how we protect our kids from all difficulty and pain. Big mistake. When we journey through hard times together, we could emerge stronger, more empathetic, more in tune with others, BETTER!
sharon
I like the distinction Penny Simkin makes, in The Birth Partner, between pain and suffering. Just because you are in pain, does not mean you are suffering. She gives the example of working out or running a marathon. It can be painful, but it's a pain you feel good about, and you are certainly not suffering. The pain of childbirth can be like that. It's not a sign that something is wrong, it's a side effect of a physiological process, and it's a productive pain which is working toward a specific outcome.
And in response to the first comment, I think those women who choose to birth naturally are not deliberately shunning available medical assistance. It's more that they are trying to avoid UNNECESSARY medical interventions. Because interventions tend to lead to more interventions which lead to more interventions... which can lead to fetal distress and an "emergency" section (as a worse case scenario).
Of course medical assistance is sometimes necessary, and it can save women and babies from dying. However, it's generally not the epidurals and pain meds that are saving people from death. I am thankful we live in a place where we have the medical technology to use when it is needed. It's all about using it appropriately, and when necessary.
As for why women would want to go natural, I think there are lots of reasons. Some women want to feel more connected to the experience, to feel the power and strength of their body, to maintain control of their labour and birth, to be empowered and to know that they can do it. To avoid the risks and drawbacks associated with interventions and pain meds, and to avoid the cascade of interventions I already mentioned. There are also important benefits, such as shorter recovery time, being able to be up and moving around (both during labour and immediately after the birth), and the production of natural endorphins and hormones which lessen pain and help with bonding, to name just a few.
Thanks, Jill! I no longer need to write my next post!
Kelley and I had a conversation about the distinction between pain and suffering the other morning, too. She said basically the same things that you did. And I agree.
Having had one natural birth and one very unnatural (induced, augmented, epidural) I natural was better. It was bloody painful and difficult, but still a much better experience.
Marlene
Haha, oops! I didn't mean to write what you were going to, Rach. Please do your next post anyway. I'd be interested in reading what you have to say about it.
Thanks for the explanation Jill - it did provide some context to why people want to do it. I was always in the "why can't they just hit me over the head and when I wake up the baby's there" camp, so I find it hard to relate to the desire for the "birth experience" (I didn't enjoy pregnancy either).
I heard a lot of horror stories before I found out I was having a c-section, so I was terrified. It was painted as a failure and that I could expect to be maimed, die, or just be incapacitated for months.
For me, it was a fantastic experience and I'm a little angry that I was told the sky was falling. It was the least painful medical procedure I've ever had, and when they put Sasha in my arms I wasn't delirious with exhaustion and pain. I could cuddle her and nurse her right away, and really be in the moment. So that's the "birth experience" I treasure.
I was up and walking the same day and back to my regular aerobic workouts three weeks later - I felt like I could do cartwheels in the living room well before that but restrained myself haha!
I guess bottom line everyone has a different experience and that's the problem with making decisions based on anecdotes. Statistically vaginal is probably better. I'm just glad I didn't have to do it.
I agree Ixy, my second section was FAR better than my first. I felt capable of doing so much more than after the first.
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